TurboNurse

This week didn't start out too well. 

Tuesday I rode my bike to work and fell over, to the right where I broke my elbow back in April, while waiting at a stop light, on the way to work.  Doh!  Luckily I just came out with a little road rash and some bruises on the insides of my knees where they met with my bike.  Of course I was still clipped in on the right side.  Again.

Wednesday-day was not too bad.  I had a real hard time staying awake during my continuum classes in the afternoon.  I got home on Wednesday and it was business as usual.  As I was making my dinner before my tae kwon do class, my cat Squeakers comes up to me and is not looking right.  He's not moving his tail at all and is having a very hard time sitting down.

I called my husband to tell him something was wrong with the cat.  He got home about 20 minutes or so before I had to leave for my TKD class and we decided we were just going to watch him to make sure everything is OK.

I got home from class and he was still the same so I took a shower and got ready for bed since I was supposed to work on Thursday.  We both thought everything was OK until he jumped up on the bed for our usual nighttime ritual and he barely made the jump and once he got up there, he just stopped as if he were in shock and just growled.  It wasn't directed at either of us but it definately wasn't normal.

So, at 10:30 at night, we are headed to the emergency vet.  Things went OK there.  We finally left at about midnight.  Squeak had to stay the night for observation.  We thought he may have had a blockage in his urethra which is common in male cats I learned.

Needless to say, I did not go into work on Thursday.  I picked him up Thursday morning.  I was up bright and early because I didn't really sleep at all Thursday morning.  I like to say that I pretended to sleep.  I was so worried about him I was awake every hour it felt like.

During the day Squeak was very lethargic, more than I would have expected so I called our regular vet to tell them what was going on.  Back to the vet we went at about 4 that afternoon.  I was so exhausted as I'm sure he was too, and when we finally got into the exam room, I put him up on the table, put my head down in front of him and started to cry.  Of course that is when the doc and the vet techs came. 

The doc did a real comprehensive exam on him and spend probably a good 45 minutes with us.  She is awesome and I really like her a lot.  She was baffled but was thinking it was one of three things.  Either he was blocked as originally thought, had thrown a blood clot, or has lumbo-sacral disease (degenerative arthritis in the lower back).

Turns out, we think it was a trauma to his low back/tail becasue of the quick turn around he made.  He spent the day at the vet on Friday for more tests and that is how the doc came to that result.

Even with all that, this week did turn out good.  My baby is OK and I had a really good day at work yesterday.

I was walking to the med room to get meds for one of my little bitties and I see the family of a kid I took care of last week and said hi to them to see how they were.  The story around them is very remarkable and really touched my heart.

The mom asked me if I could primary their baby while I was talking to them.  What a compliment!!  I was so honored and would have jumped on it if I weren't in orientation.  I explained to her that I wasn't able to because of orientation.  If they are still here when I am done, I'm seriously considering taking them on, even though they don't recomend taht as a new person, we just really have a connection between us.

It's just amazing to me that they asked me to do that for their child, even knowing that I am new.  It really brings together the fact that we DO make a difference when we go to work as nurses. 

Sometimes we go home and feel like we don't do anything but in reality, we make a big impact on our patients and their lives, and in my case, the familys life.  It's hard for us to see this because it's just another job, another day, another patient, that we are there to take care of. 

I feel like I create this disconnect with most of my babies on purpose because if I didn't, I would constantly be bringing work home with me and that is not healthy.  I like my job but I also love the social life that I have and don't want to mix the two too much.  Because of this, I care for my babies but I don't let myself get attached.

For that reason, it's a job.  It's just a job and nothing more.  Most of us don't have the time to stop and think if we are really making a difference or not because of that disconnect. 

When something like this happens, it brings us back into the reality of things and how we really do imact all the lives around us when we work.

Being a nurse is really an amazing thing.  I can't imagine doing anything different.  My heart is here and where my heart is, I am.